Being a parent is enjoyable, stressful, joyful, overwhelming, and consuming. Born with your child is the regular concern with their safety, worrying about if their doing everything right or worrying about doing everything wrong.
Some parents try so hard to be nothing like their own parents, so that their own children never experience the childhood they so dreadfully remember. This may sound like just doing things completely opposite to how you were taught, but how do you do everything you’ve ever known…completely opposite?
Establishing and maintaining a healthy family system is not something that comes naturally to everyone, especially if this was not modelled in your own home. Some parents may not even realize what it means to have a healthy family dynamic, and others may simply not know how to change their ways and achieve it.
You’re NOT Alone
It is perfectly okay not having a solution to every parenting challenge, and it is okay to ask for help. Whether this is from friends and/or family that you trust, or from a health professional…there is strength and perseverance in the ability to ask for help. If you find yourself struggling with the demands of being a parent and running a family, please reach out to the Vaughan Relationship Centre; our therapists will help you determine goals that are not only ideal for your family, but also achievable and maintainable.
What Does Family Counselling Involve?
1. The families hopes, goals and fears may be brought to light so the members are able to better understand and communicate with each other.
2. Helping each member understand how their words and/or behavior has an effect on the rest of the family, or specific members.
3. Work on reducing blame and increasing the level of cooperation.
4. Learning to appropriately, and effectively manage conflict in the home.
5. Ensuring each member has the opportunity to speak and express themselves.
To Be Noted…
· If the first session feels uncomfortable or confrontational, don’t give up just yet! Rainbows only show themselves after a storm.
· Sometimes, counselling as a family may work to resolve conflicts, but other times it may be difficult for parents and children to openly say some things in front of the other just yet. If some members aren’t ready for family counselling just yet, this is more than okay; your therapist will make the arrangements for the family and/or individuals accordingly.
· Family therapy is not simply here just to make the problems “go away”; the goal is finding solutions that make the family stronger in the short and long term future.